Here's presenting the story of the eternal lover boy...
I am the "stud-boy", or so people think. I have always prided myself to be the best. People agree. I've had girls hovering over me like bees over flowers. Yes, I was proud of it back then, very proud if I may add. I could get who I want when I wanted. No strings attached, I loved my life. Yes, that's the one thing I loved - life.. MY LIFE. Cold hearted beast who gave people the warmth they needed, but kept my heart frozen in time. And then, I saw her.. That was not the face that launched a thousand ships. What's with that attitude? Can't she ever be normal? Now that's one girl I wouldn't want to be associated with. Miss goody-two-shoes. But she caught my attention.. arrghh.. obviously! She's a freak show!
Few years later..
I was still the hunk. Nothing had changed. I was the centre of all the attention and I basked in its glory. There she was again. She might as well be stalking me! She had grown quite contrary to what I had imagined.
There she was, shy, coy, keeping to herself. There was something about her, something inexplicable, something warm. Those eyes, I swear they could bore holes in your body if they wanted to, but they just looked intently, eye lids lowering at every contact. That smile, innocence yet impish, fresh and wide, revealing goodness yet concealing a mystery.That was not the face that launched a thousand ships. But it set something off in my heart. Was it a beat? Was my heart telling me something for the first time? What rubbish, I said. My heart has been frozen since time unknown.
She walks up to me. Wait. Was that a jolt that I just felt? As her lips parted, sweetest of voice addressed me by my name. Never has my name sounded this pleasant. She might as well be calling me a hero! The first real conversation we had left me wanting many more. Few more conversations and I knew I had her where I wanted. She liked me. She admitted. Mission accomplished. Time to move on.
Few months later..
Why the hell haven't I moved on? I wanted her to admit her feelings. One more achievement to my glorious list. Its game over. Isn't it? Well.. I guess not. I miss that voice. I miss that smile. Those eyes, that look of trust, damn I miss it all. She has her hooks deep in my chest! I have never missed a girl!I should probably call her.
That voice may as well take my life. What have I done to earn this trust? Am I even worthy of this love? She had forgiven me. We were friends. But she wanted more. Wait a minute.. was it her or me? I don't remember.. All I do remember is the day when I realized she was far away. So far that I couldn't talk to her. I was almost dead to her. I knew she cared but was I too late?
Few months later..
Destiny brought us face to face. I knew the ice cage had melted. Heart was beating faster with every passing moment. This is it. I am not letting her go anywhere. I have never had to confess anything in my life. But then again, I had no life prior to this moment. My life was staring at me with those beautiful teary eyes. She might as well have killed me! I am never letting those flow down her cheek ever again. I take her in my arms. For the first time, I experience comfort. The warmth of her embrace, the softness of her body, her perfumed hair on my chest, her gentle voice confessing her love for me. This is probably the moment where I was the richest guy in the world, for I finally had my world in my arms.
Few years later..
Those precious beads were flowing down her cheek. I know I had hurt her. I promised her to take care of her. But I must've failed. Those eye accused me. It tore me apart, for I loved her more than anything. She's my world and now she wanted to leave. My world wanted to go away from me. It's your call baby, I said. While my heart cried and pleaded silently, stay with me, please. She did leave. And she took my life with her.
As I sit and ponder over the whole episode now, with a glass of the most expensive scotch ever tasted by mankind, in a mansion built over my love, with the million dollars in my account not being able to buy me peace, I think was it worth it? If only money could bring back time, I would have never let her go. Hell, I would have imprisoned her in my heart and blurred her with my love. I got all that I wanted but haven't got the only thing I really need. Why didn't she wait for me? Over years I have slogged my back side at work, trying to forget her. Achieved all that was to achieve, destroying every obstacle on the way. But she was still there. The faint smell of her perfume reminded me of the void in my heart. The very thought brings a sharp pain. My vision was blurring. I could hear the siren, the commotion. Oh wait.. I hear her. I can't forget the voice. She's here.. Why can't I open my eyes. I can feel pain no more, just her presence. The world shuts itself. It's all dark now, the voices have faded into oblivion.
Some precious moments layer..
I struggle to force my eyes open. There she was. My world was there, right in front of me. I could feel her touch over my forehead. The touch, I had craved for. The trust I had missed all along. The love I had left behind. It was all there. It must have been a dream. Or I was in heaven. Either which way, I am not leaving this place. "Welcome back", she said. "Feels like I lost it all only to find it the next moment." I could see those precious beads down her cheek again. I knew I had hurt her again. But this time she was here. So was I. She held my hand and I knew my life depended on this hold. I could never release that hand. I could never let her go.
Overwhelmed, I could only mouth these words,You came back...
So did you..., she said.
While I was on that bed, what hurt me the most were the things I should have said but I didn't. Flashes of my life had her face, not my wealth, not my ferrari, just lovely beautiful her. I swore to myself, if I ever to get a second chance, I would give it all up to win her back. Winning what you have lost makes you the most confident person. But you do not always get a second chance, especially not at love. I lost my world, I won it back. It's a second chance for both of us.
I look into those eye. I know I have nothing to fear. My life is with me now. And I am not letting it go anywhere..
They call me the lover boy. You need not make the same mistakes I did. Don't ever leave anything unspoken. Make sure you tell you better half how much you love them and their value in your life. Remember, the most painful things are the ones you didn't do when you should have, when you could have. Don't let them haunt you. Love the way you wanna be loved..
Lover Boy
I am the "stud-boy", or so people think. I have always prided myself to be the best. People agree. I've had girls hovering over me like bees over flowers. Yes, I was proud of it back then, very proud if I may add. I could get who I want when I wanted. No strings attached, I loved my life. Yes, that's the one thing I loved - life.. MY LIFE. Cold hearted beast who gave people the warmth they needed, but kept my heart frozen in time. And then, I saw her.. That was not the face that launched a thousand ships. What's with that attitude? Can't she ever be normal? Now that's one girl I wouldn't want to be associated with. Miss goody-two-shoes. But she caught my attention.. arrghh.. obviously! She's a freak show!
Few years later..
I was still the hunk. Nothing had changed. I was the centre of all the attention and I basked in its glory. There she was again. She might as well be stalking me! She had grown quite contrary to what I had imagined.
There she was, shy, coy, keeping to herself. There was something about her, something inexplicable, something warm. Those eyes, I swear they could bore holes in your body if they wanted to, but they just looked intently, eye lids lowering at every contact. That smile, innocence yet impish, fresh and wide, revealing goodness yet concealing a mystery.That was not the face that launched a thousand ships. But it set something off in my heart. Was it a beat? Was my heart telling me something for the first time? What rubbish, I said. My heart has been frozen since time unknown.
She walks up to me. Wait. Was that a jolt that I just felt? As her lips parted, sweetest of voice addressed me by my name. Never has my name sounded this pleasant. She might as well be calling me a hero! The first real conversation we had left me wanting many more. Few more conversations and I knew I had her where I wanted. She liked me. She admitted. Mission accomplished. Time to move on.
Few months later..
Why the hell haven't I moved on? I wanted her to admit her feelings. One more achievement to my glorious list. Its game over. Isn't it? Well.. I guess not. I miss that voice. I miss that smile. Those eyes, that look of trust, damn I miss it all. She has her hooks deep in my chest! I have never missed a girl!I should probably call her.
That voice may as well take my life. What have I done to earn this trust? Am I even worthy of this love? She had forgiven me. We were friends. But she wanted more. Wait a minute.. was it her or me? I don't remember.. All I do remember is the day when I realized she was far away. So far that I couldn't talk to her. I was almost dead to her. I knew she cared but was I too late?
Few months later..
Destiny brought us face to face. I knew the ice cage had melted. Heart was beating faster with every passing moment. This is it. I am not letting her go anywhere. I have never had to confess anything in my life. But then again, I had no life prior to this moment. My life was staring at me with those beautiful teary eyes. She might as well have killed me! I am never letting those flow down her cheek ever again. I take her in my arms. For the first time, I experience comfort. The warmth of her embrace, the softness of her body, her perfumed hair on my chest, her gentle voice confessing her love for me. This is probably the moment where I was the richest guy in the world, for I finally had my world in my arms.
Few years later..
Those precious beads were flowing down her cheek. I know I had hurt her. I promised her to take care of her. But I must've failed. Those eye accused me. It tore me apart, for I loved her more than anything. She's my world and now she wanted to leave. My world wanted to go away from me. It's your call baby, I said. While my heart cried and pleaded silently, stay with me, please. She did leave. And she took my life with her.
As I sit and ponder over the whole episode now, with a glass of the most expensive scotch ever tasted by mankind, in a mansion built over my love, with the million dollars in my account not being able to buy me peace, I think was it worth it? If only money could bring back time, I would have never let her go. Hell, I would have imprisoned her in my heart and blurred her with my love. I got all that I wanted but haven't got the only thing I really need. Why didn't she wait for me? Over years I have slogged my back side at work, trying to forget her. Achieved all that was to achieve, destroying every obstacle on the way. But she was still there. The faint smell of her perfume reminded me of the void in my heart. The very thought brings a sharp pain. My vision was blurring. I could hear the siren, the commotion. Oh wait.. I hear her. I can't forget the voice. She's here.. Why can't I open my eyes. I can feel pain no more, just her presence. The world shuts itself. It's all dark now, the voices have faded into oblivion.
Some precious moments layer..
I struggle to force my eyes open. There she was. My world was there, right in front of me. I could feel her touch over my forehead. The touch, I had craved for. The trust I had missed all along. The love I had left behind. It was all there. It must have been a dream. Or I was in heaven. Either which way, I am not leaving this place. "Welcome back", she said. "Feels like I lost it all only to find it the next moment." I could see those precious beads down her cheek again. I knew I had hurt her again. But this time she was here. So was I. She held my hand and I knew my life depended on this hold. I could never release that hand. I could never let her go.
Overwhelmed, I could only mouth these words,You came back...
So did you..., she said.
While I was on that bed, what hurt me the most were the things I should have said but I didn't. Flashes of my life had her face, not my wealth, not my ferrari, just lovely beautiful her. I swore to myself, if I ever to get a second chance, I would give it all up to win her back. Winning what you have lost makes you the most confident person. But you do not always get a second chance, especially not at love. I lost my world, I won it back. It's a second chance for both of us.
I look into those eye. I know I have nothing to fear. My life is with me now. And I am not letting it go anywhere..
They call me the lover boy. You need not make the same mistakes I did. Don't ever leave anything unspoken. Make sure you tell you better half how much you love them and their value in your life. Remember, the most painful things are the ones you didn't do when you should have, when you could have. Don't let them haunt you. Love the way you wanna be loved..
Lover Boy
:)
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